Complete Surrender

 "When I feel alone, I remember You (God) are with me."

In this chapter 14 of the book Pray With Purpose, Live With Passion, the author begins by telling us about having surgery and discovering she had ovarian cancer.  She talks about how God took her through every worst case scenario.  She told Him how she didn't want their two year old to be without a mommy, her husband without a wife and ended with how she didn't want to leave her family.  Each time God reassured her.

I have been in her shoes without the illness.  A few years ago I was sitting in worship during the closing.  We were singing "I Surrender All" and God began dealing with me that I had not truly surrendered everything to His care.  I immediately knew He was talking about my family and their physical protection.  The questions started in, "If one of your children died, would you still love me?"

I began crying, but knew in my heart and stated, "Yes, Lord, I would still love and serve You."  "If your parents died...?"  "Yes, Lord, I would still love and serve You."  After going through several, the one I knew I would struggle with the most came upon me.  "If Michael died......would you still love and serve me?"  My heart nearly broke in two and I sobbed for a few moments before I could utter the words, "Yes, Lord.  I love You and I would still serve You." 

I sit here crying, heart breaking, knowing that our pastor's wife has been going through this for a few days now as she watched her beloved Larry lying in a hospital bed, unmoving.  This morning, at 2:05 am he went to be with the Lord.  I rejoice for him and count him extremely blessed, but cry for Carole.  However, she is a child of the Most High King.  He will be her guiding strength, her right arm, her comfort.  As I prayed for her and their family the other day, I pictured in my mind her throwing her arms around Jesus' neck and burying her face in His chest.  He wrapped His arms around her and held on tight.  I know without a doubt that He has continued doing so and will continue.
Despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.Romans 8:37

All to Jesus I surrender,

All to Him I freely give.

I will ever love and trust Him,

In His presence daily live.

I surrender all.

I surrender all.

All to Thee my blessed Savior,

I surrender all.