I Want? or I Will!

“What are you going to do today?” This is the question my husband asks each morning. What he is really asking is, “Are you going anywhere today?” Why? Because he prays for my safety and is on the alert if something should happen where I need his help. There have been a few times he has had to come to my rescue while I was out running errands. This morning I thought a moment and then told him I didn't really know yet. That was the truth. I don't have anywhere I need to go, the house is clean, just needs a little straightening which will take all of maybe an hour to accomplish, so now the question is, “What do I want to do with my day?” Want...there's that word again. What do I want to do.

A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest; so shall your poverty come like a prowler, and your need like an armed man. Proverbs 24:33-34 (NKJV)

As I read these two verses this morning I was reminded that I could choose to do nothing to very little, (Which is something we all say we wish we could choose, but don't really want as it is BORING!!!!) or I could pray and ask God to guide me through the day and do the things He lays on my heart to accomplish. I can choose whichever of these I want. If I choose the first, I will sit around maybe reading a book, watching TV, playing a game, but accomplishing nothing of much import and at the end of the day I will feel dissatisfied. I know, because I have actually made this choice more than once before. Now, admittedly, if I made this choice day in and day out, I would not really know and understand the joy of accomplishment in hard work, so wouldn't recognize the dissatisfaction that comes from it, so would not know what I was missing. However, there was a time many years ago that I did a study on laziness and realized that I had allowed that evil companion to run my life.  This made a rather drastic change inside me.  I claimed that I wanted a clean house, wanted time to sew, wanted time to crochet, wanted time to study, etc., but during this study I dug deep inside and made an astonishing discovery. I will do whatever it is that I truly want to do according to what part of me I am listening to at the time. If I am listening to my flesh, I will want to do something I consider restful all the time. What I will accomplish from doing so is filthy clutter around my home, which will lead to arguments over things not being able to be found, gifts not being completed so having to go out and spend more money, weight gain because my body is not getting the exercise it needs, health problems, because I will be breathing in the dust and germs I refuse to get rid of, etc., not to mention the general crankiness that comes from always feeling tired from doing little to nothing.

If I choose to listen to my spirit, which is a worker created in God's image, I will work hard, play hard and truly enjoy life as it was meant to be enjoyed by the Creator. I will have a clean, but played in home, (so there may be a few toys and things out here and there) I will be healthier, striving against lost articles will cease and there will be more peace in my home. I will stop saying, “I want to take my family to church,” “I want to spend more time with my children,” “I want to have more money to give,” and so on, because I will realize that I can do whatever I really want to do if I will simply get up and get doing. As long as I keep saying “I want” I will never get to the point of saying and really meaning, “I will.”

My life has had many ups and downs. As I think back on the downs, I realize that many of them, not all, but many, were related to my making a choice to listen to my flesh. For instance, several years ago I was backing out of the garage at night. I was feeling irritated at my husband or kids at the time (I don't remember which) when one of them turned out the light in the garage. I allowed my temper to rule and floored the gas pedal. I misjudged and ended up shattering the side mirror. Cost over a hundred dollars to repair. You would laugh to see how cautiously I back out of there now.

When I started having children, I used them as an excuse to not have a clean house. Because of this, I experienced many an embarrassment of people coming to surprise visit to a very messy house. Once I was willing to admit that I was choosing to have a messy home, I had to blame myself instead.  However, my house became clean, even though it was "busy" with toys, games and puzzles.

Let it be understood that it is my opinion that if a house with children living in it does not have toys laying around during the day, there is something wrong. Children need the freedom to use their imaginations, with their parents guidance. Without guidance, imaginations can get you into trouble. (Just ask any child from birth to 100 who can talk.) There is a huge difference between a messy house and a lived and loved in home. Our homes, both our body and building, need to be clean not only on the outside, but on the inside as well. Living and loving will cause bumps and bruises, and scattering of toys, but a little straightening fixes that so that we can begin the living and loving fresh every morning.

Father God, there have been many a time that I have said I want to do something, but have done nothing about it, which tells me I didn't really want to do it after all. Help me continue growing in this area to reach the place of asking You each morning what needs to be done and share with You the things I think I would like to do so that You can work in me to not only want, but to will to do them if they also be Your heart desire for me. If they are not in Your plans, then remove the want. Help me not to pass blame onto others that actually belongs to me for not meeting a particular goal. Remind me each day that I am the one making the choices, so I need to take responsibility for the results. Help me also remember that straightening my body and building houses needs to be a daily event. Letting things slide for a time only brings frustration and a heavier burden and makes it easier for laziness to take hold. Don't allow Your children to be lazy. Work in us to will and to do Your good purposes. (Philippians 2:13) In Jesus' precious name I ask it.