I was a newly born again sixteen year old girl and felt a desperation inside to speak up and give testimony to what was burning in my heart. So I raised my hand, was called on and blurted out, "God is calling me to teach!" There were no accolades, no ooo's or aw's uttered, but a very matter-of-fact statement was issued instead. "All right, we have a preschool class that needs filling. You can begin teaching the two and three year old class at the quarter." That was only a few weeks away and I was terrified, but excited at the same time. I had no idea what I was doing, but You did! If I had had time to think about it, I would have probably declined. Instead I began studying Your Word and asking You for ideas. You used this catalyst to begin a love for teaching and working with children in me that I never dreamed possible!
In my later twenties You did it again. Sitting in church one evening we were asked if we had a vision. I raised my hand and began a discussion on how children sit in worship never really understanding what is going on and a vision I had for Children's Worship. I was calmly told I would begin in two weeks time! Another bout of fear and desperation, but excitement washed over me. Now I began studying and asking direction all the harder! I tried for a year to devote myself simply to this, but ended up going right back to to teaching children in Bible study as well. You had begun a flood of desire to teach within me.
Now, at fifty seven I am still teaching children by volunteering at Seckman Elementary and leading a kindergarten class in Bible study and various other areas. But there is a dream You placed on my heart years ago to make toys and write a children's book, and now You are showing me exactly what it is You were talking about. Again, Lord, scary. Such a seemingly monumental task, yet I choose to
be obedient, because I know that You have continually taken what seems impossible to me and brought it about, making it easy. Okay, not so easy to my flesh, my my spirit takes great joy in it all and longs for more to do to bring You joy. My life is not defined by what I do, but by what You do through me!! For far too long I have tried to use my life to define who You are to others. What is that?!! My life in itself is nothing!! It is You in my life that defines me, not the other way around!!
So now I can relax in knowing that it is You at work, I just need to be the vessel. It is like at Thanksgiving. The food has a big job to do. It must go through the trial of being chopped, stuffed, cut, and then seasoned differently, but then comes the trial of fire. But when all is said and done, everyone that partakes of the meal is happy and satisfied, not because the food went through all that work, but because the chef did!! The food was just what he/she used to bring great joy to others!!
That's what I want to be like, Lord!! You do all the preparation and bring me through all the necessary trials that go with it, so that I my life can be a morsel of delight to the world to see, smell, and touch that brings great delight and a desire to taste!! Then, when they actually ask for a bite, they can hear the truth - it is not me they desire at all, but the Chef who prepared me. Then they can not just taste, but have the Chef with them and in them!! If they heed this, they will experience a taste that will keep them going back for more!!
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